Catching up

It's really been 3 weeks since I wrote anything! Time flies when ... well it flies anyway. This spring has been a continual struggle. Hit it hard, then sit and wait. Hit it hard then sit and wait. We made a lot of progress Thursday. By 6 PM Friday we were back to waiting on dry ground again.

Steve came and drove a tractor for us Thursday. He disked about 150 acres while Aman cut wheat and I kind of ran around trying to keep everything going smoothly I had planned on drilling double crop beans but ended up spending about half the time in a grain truck. But we finished up wheat, caught up on the double cropping, and Steve got us a couple days ahead of where we would have been.

We finished wheat harvest. Yields and test weight were about the same. Siemer's has tightened their test weight requrements, so anything below 54 pound test weight was being rejected. Any anything below 56 pounds took a real price hit. The most common comment heard in lin at the elevator was "I may not even raise any wheat next year".

Friday I planted beans while Aman made some seed delveries. Then he planted while Sue and I went to see a lawyer for a real estate closing. We are now the proud owners of 25 acres behind the old school in West Union. It includes the paint ball course, but they're supposed to move it.

Oh, and yes, we still have ground too wet to drive on ... but I fired up one irrigator Friday morning and will probably start another Sunday or Monday if it doesn't rain.

We are still planting beans. I disked about 40 acres today for the first time this year, then turned around and disked it again. If it doesn't rain (40% chance after midnight) I intend to plant it Sunday afternoon. We planted the 40 acres at Mom's north and south, then was able to get about 20 acres on Murphy behind it and 16 acres on Gramps south of it planted a few days later. Haven't been able to touch the rest of it. Well, not entirely true. We could have made a round and half around the edge of the planted corn to plant beans but decided it wasn't worth the effort.

I told Mom my goal today was to not get stuck, anything else was a side beneft. Just about didn't achieve my goal. 3 times I had the transport wheels on the disk pushing mud. One time I thought I was stopped. No, I was stopped. I just was able to get it going again.

We were at the point today where we really only had field work for one person, so Aman and Becky took the boys to the antique tractor pull at the Martinsville Fair today to be pit crew for Uncle Ben. He bought a Super M and this was his first attempt at pulling. Becky had a photo of the boys on Facebook, and I can just see the wheels turning in their heads:


Well, yes, it is past 2:30 AM. I fell asleep watching TV and when I woke up about 1:30 I was wide awake. I think I have wound down enough to head for bed. Later all.

Buster

Hope Prairie Farmer doesn't mind, I'm copying something from page 4 of their June 2009 issue. Why is it relevant to me? Bill's wife mentioned in the article is Dad's cousin. See the entire article along with Buster's photo at http://magissues.farmprogress.com/PRA/PF06Jun09/pra004.pdf

THIS is the story of how a little city dog became a big part of our farm over the course of the last year. It’s also a great story of how two lonely souls found a wonderful friendship together. The first lonely soul is my grandpa, who after almost 60 years of living with my grandma could no longer give the level of care she needed and had to move her to an assisted living community a little over a year ago.
Being of exceptional health for his age, Grandpa focused on helping us on the farm. One day last spring, we sent him after a gas cylinder for the torch, and he brought home someone else. He was a young collie-sheltie mix pup named Buster who also suddenly found himself alone after his family had to move away. After Buster’s family moved, he began staying temporarily at the neighboring welding shop until Grandpa saw him and decided to bring him home.
During this past year, Buster has become an outstanding farm dog. He quickly made friends with our longtime farm dog, Sosha. They both do an excellent job keeping the rodents and strangers in check around the farm. Buster is Grandpa’s dedicated tagalong, riding to town or out to the fi elds. He goes no matter whether they are taking one of the trucks, the semi, a tractor or even the motorcycle. Whenever Grandpa cannot take Buster with him, he waits at the south place with Sosha until he sees the vehicle Grandpa took to town coming up the road. Then, like a shot, he runs back up to the other farmhouse to eagerly greet his master.
Buster has shown me what a positive difference a good little dog can make. I am very glad Grandpa has such a good friend to run around with and come home to instead of being alone.
Owner: Bill Furry, Charleston
Writer: Todd Easton, Charleston

Don't think I want an electric fence...

I laughed so hard I had tears. For those of you that grew up on a farm this should bring back some fond memories.

Don't think I want an electric fence...

from http://talk.newagtalk.com/forums/thread-view.asp?tid=100673&mid=712411#M712411

We have the standard 6 ft. fence in the backyard, and a few months ago, I heard about burglaries increasing dramatically in the entire city.

To make sure this never happened to me, I got an electric fence and ran a single wire along the top of the fence.

Actually, I got the biggest cattle charger Tractor Supply had, made for 26 miles of fence. I then used an 8 ft. long ground rod, and drove it
7.5 feet into the ground. The ground rod is the key, with the more you have in the ground, the better the fence works.

One day I'm mowing the back yard with my cheapo Wal-Mart 6hp big wheel push mower. The hot wire is broken and laying out in the yard. I knew for a fact that I unplugged the charger. I pushed the mower around the wire and reached down to grab it, to throw it out of the way.

It seems as though I hadn't remembered to unplug it after all.

Now I'm standing there, I've got the running lawnmower in my right hand and the 1.7 gigavolt fence wire in the other hand. Keep in mind the charger is about the size of a marine battery and has a picture of an upside down cow on fire on the cover.

Time stood still.

The first thing I notice is my pecker trying to climb up the front side of my body. My ears curled downwards and I could feel the lawnmower ignition firing in the backside of my brain. Every time that Briggs & Stratton rolled over, I could feel the spark in my head. I was literally at one with the engine.

It seems as though the fence charger and the piece of **** lawnmower were fighting over who would control my electrical impulses.

Science says you cannot crap, pee, and vomit at the same time. I beg to differ. Not only did I do all three at once, but my bowels emptied 3 different times in less than half of a second. It was a Matrix kind of bowel movement, where time is creeping along and you're all leaned back and BAM- BAM- BAM you just crap your pants 3 times. It seemed like there were minutes in between but in reality it was so close together it was like exhaust pulses from a big block Chevy turning 8 grand.

At this point I'm about 30 minutes (maybe 2 seconds) into holding onto the fence wire. My hand is wrapped around the wire palm down so I can't let go. I grew up on a farm so I know all about electric fences.....but Dad always had those piece of **** chargers made by International or whoever that were like
9 volts and just kinda tickled.

This one I could not let go of. The 8 foot long ground rod is now accepting signals from me through the perm-a-damp Ark-La-Tex river bottom soil.

At this point I'm thinking I'm going to have to just man up and take it, until the lawnmower runs out of gas.

'Damn!,' I think, as I remember I just filled the tank!

Now the lawnmower is starting to run rough. It has settled into a loping run pattern as if it had some kind of big lawnmower race cam in it.

Covered in poop, pee, and with my vomit on my chest I think 'Oh God please die... Pleeeeaze die'. But Nooooo, it settles into the rough lumpy cam idle nicely and remains there, like a big bore roller cam EFI motor waiting for the go command from its owner's right foot.

So here I am in the middle of July, 104 degrees, 80% humidity, standing in my own backyard, begging God to kill me. God did not take me that day.....he left me there covered in my own fluids to writhe in the misery my own stupidity had created.

I honestly don't know how I got loose from the wire... I woke up laying on the ground hours later. The lawnmower was beside me, out of gas. It was later on in the day and I was sunburned.

There were two large dead grass spots where I had been standing, and then another long skinny dead spot where the wire had laid while I was on the ground still holding on to it. I assume I finally had a seizure and in the resulting thrashing had somehow let go of the wire.

Upon waking from my electrically induced sleep I realized a few things:

1- Three of my teeth seem to have melted.

2- I now have cramps in the bottoms of my feet and my right buttcheek
(not the left, just the right)

3- Poop, pee, and vomit when all mixed together, do not smell as bad as you might think.

4- My left eye will not open.

5- My right eye will not close.

6- The lawnmower runs like a sum0000 now. Seriously! I think our little session cleared out some carbon fouling or something, because it was better than new after that.

7- My nuts are still smaller than average yet they are almost a foot long.

8- I can turn on the TV in the game room by farting while thinking of the number 4 (still don't understand this???).

That day changed my life. I now have a newfound respect for things. I appreciate the little things more, and now I always triple check to make sure the fence is unplugged before I mow.

The good news, is that if a burglar does try to come over the fence, I can clearly visualize what my security system will do to him, and THAT gives me a warm and fuzzy feeling all over, which also reminds me to triple check before I mow.

Mother's Brownies

For Mother's Day, a brownie recipe I was sent

"Mom's Special Brownies"

Remove teddy bear from oven and preheat oven to 375.
Melt 1 cup margarine in saucepan.
Remove teddy bear from oven and tell Jr., "No, no."
Add margarine to 2 cups sugar.
Take shortening can away from Jr. and clean cupboards.
Measure 1/3 cup cocoa.
Take shortening can away from Jr. again and bathe cat.
Apply antiseptic and bandages to scratches sustained while removing shortening from cat's tail.
Assemble 4 eggs, 2 tsp. vanilla, and 1-1/2 cups sifted flour.

Take smoldering teddy bear from oven and open all doors and windows for ventilation.

Take telephone away from Billy and assure party on the line the call was a mistake. Call operator and attempt to have direct dialed call removed from bill.

Measure 1 tsp. salt, 1/2 cup nuts and beat all ingredients well.
Let cat out of refrigerator.
Pour mixture into well-greased 9x13-inch pan.
Bake 25 minutes.
Rescue cat and take razor away from Billy.
Explain to kids that you have no idea if shaved cats will sunburn. Throw cat outside while there's still time and he's still able to run away.

FROSTING Mix the following in saucepan:
1 cup sugar
1 oz unsweetened chocolate
1/4 cup margarine Take the darn teddy bear out of the @#$% broiler and throw it away -- far away.

Answer the door and meekly explain to nice policeman that you didn't know Jr. had slipped out of the house and was heading for the street.
Put Jr. in playpen.

Add 1/3 cup milk, dash of salt, and boil, stirring constantly for 2 minutes.

Answer door and apologize to neighbor for Billy having stuck a garden hose in man's front door mail slot. Promise to pay for ruined carpet.

Tie Billy to clothesline.

Remove burned brownies from oven.

Collapse and call the baker for delivery.

My wife has left me ...

but she'll be home tonight. Sue and a car load of others went to Lincoln Christian College Ladies' Day. I think she set the alarm clock an hour earlier than she intended, but she was up and ready!

OK, so what is "all that GPS crap" (as my friend Karla puts it) and how do you use it? Installation of a basic systemis simple. You put a box in the tractor cab and an antenna on the roof. Oh, and the tractor is RED, not pink. That's a phone camera for you.



You set the box for how wide your implement is. When you start your first pass you set an "A" point, go to the other end and set a "B" point. It then calculates where every pass should be across the field. When you are in the correct place the light in the row across the middle of the box will be lit. If you ar exact the vertical lines will light. If you are off the vertical lines show you which way to steer to get back to where you should be.
I'd show you what that looks like but that would mean I made an error ...

Something interesting it allows you to do is skip passes It isn't an issue for us, but let's say you were pulling a small mounted implement and your tractor didn't turn very tight. You could skip a pass across the field so turning was easier and then come back and get the skips.

This is straight line mode. There is a curved line mode which follows around curves and such. I've not played with that mode, I don't know if it keys off the AB line or follows the last pass. The problem with the straight mode is if you are off 2 feet on a pass the next pass doesn't correct for that. it just shos where you should have been relative to the AB line. And that may be feature you get for spending more money than we did.

Gotta run. We got one field of corn planted before the rain. I think we are down for over a week the way the weather man is talking.

Stalking the Wild Mushroom

Let's start with something you probably never saw before ... Mom with a grease gun. Notice the disposable glove on her right hand (couldn't waste 2 of them). Oh, and guys, be sure and comment on the new hairdo.

OK, so we are off in search of the wild mushroom. Now a true mushroom hunter scales mountains ... well at least hills and valleys, tromps through the woods to remote spots, and NEVER reveals their secret location. Proper equipment includes a walking stick and a couple empty bread sacks. Wal-mart bags will do, but true connoisseur's use nothing but a bread sack or ice cream bucket. So off we go...

I however just stop the lawnmower in the front yard and start finding these (Note my phone camera handles light strangely. These are white not red)

Successful? Well, Sue and I found 44 in the front yard.

Now if y'all will excuse me, we're having mushroms for breakfast.

Watched my annual basketball game

OK, so I am not the biggest sports fan in the world. It isn't that I hate football/baseball/basketball/soccer/tennis/ping-pong/etc. It just isn't something I get wound up tight about. But we did set and watch a basketball game on TV tonight. The whole game. Marshall High School made it to the state final four. They played good, but just could not hit the basket.

I'm still not ready for Spring, but I am getting closer. We have the Tilloll rebuilt, the new drill is at the dealer's, seed production contracts have been signed, most of the commercial seed corn and seed beans have been delivered, the fuel tanks are full. We are getting there.


Aman and I made a technological advancement this week. We purchased a couple Outback S-Lite lightbars. Just a few years ago this technology would have cost 3 times what we gave for it. It isn't top of the line ... it doesn't draw maps or steer the tractor itself. But they should help us drive straighter an keep our spacing better.